Drill Sergeant Pt 2

Arrival time was 1pm, this of course was so we could spend all day together before dinner.

Not what she had in mind. I opened her gate and spotted Drill Sergeant in some sort of backyard commando kit hovering impatiently around an enormous pile of pavers. Perhaps she had arranged a small herd of lesbians to help?

I spent the next 9 hours digging, raking, scraping, measuring, stomping, banging (not that kind), swearing under my breath, perspiring, bleeding and sobbing (quietly). Finally at 10pm Drill Sergeant exclaimed it was time for food – that I must be hungry by now. I was simply too tired to recommend where she could thrust the hamburger on offer.

She asked if I wouldn’t mind driving us to the burger joint and I was too stupefied to object (not that she would have noticed).

This next bit won’t surprise you, as by now I am sure you have acknowledged my position as the bathmat. Upon arriving at the window in the drive through, she permitted me then to pay.

Back at Drill Sergeant’s house we fell into her lounge together.  Drill flicked on the television and took a bite into the burger that I PAID FOR. She didn’t seem to recognize the channel was on ABC’s Question Time in Parliament. Perhaps under different circumstances I might find members of the parliament asking questions of Government Ministers extremely riveting, however under no circumstances is it sexy. Nor was the aroma of her empty shoes, the sound of her snoring, or the sight of the burger that I PAID FOR resting on her bib.

I managed to extricate myself safely from the thundering ogre, but not without being completely traumatized from the entire incident.

I learned that if someone invites me over for dinner at 1pm, be suspicious of her motives.